THE NEWPORT GAG REFLEX

TEAM GREEN
This is Green Week on NBC so it was only appropriate that we all piled into one car for our match on Acquidneck Island. Sometimes we make good conscious decisions, other times we have 2 cars with no gas and a mini-van that has its dvd player stuck on Little Mermaid. Too bad Jenks wasn't there to tote us all down there in the Electric car. Thanks for the ride Al.

THE MATCHES

When it was over we split 2-2. Jenks has the deciding match to play. I think he's shy - 2 weeks, 2 matches and neither with the team.

Dobby at 5 - This was the first B - match for Dobby. He climbed out of the C division to compete on Tuesdays. The match was not his best and he clearly got caught up playing CJ's game - lots of short shots, drops and barely any length. Dobby did throw in his patented D-league boast that worked 1 time out of too many. Not sure what got him out of his game. Maybe it was the gracious invitationS to join him to play on the weekend at St. George's, or, maybe he became disconcerted when Gryphon started cheering for CJ after a Griff-like, cross-court, chop, drop shot. In any event there will be plenty more matches. Besides the invitation to play, CJ also opened up to Al and all that his wife is due with their first child in March. As a father of 3, Al felt confident providing parenting tips.

Griff - The #4 match was over before it started. Griff knew as soon as he saw the bloodshot and watery eyes of his opponent that Henry was either hung over or just got off the Red-Eye. I didn't have a chance to see a point. 3-0 to Griff in 10 minutes - no sweat! Why bother washing your stuff or showering?

Capt. - You know what really pisses me off? When the ref doesn't know the rules. This isn't the D league anymore!!! You should know the difference between a let and a stroke at this level. Well, the temper flared, I got my point across and I channeled my energy into the match and defeated the loser of the Democratic primary for the Office of Secretary of State. His 2nd child is due in March - no advice offered.

Neens - She's so savy. She utilizes the mind game psych-out to gain advantage at the beginning - "Oh, your going to kill me." "You're so much younger." Anyway, the score didn't show very much disparity. The 2-3 loss to the 22 year old teacher at Portsmouth Abbey turned out to be a great match with some fantastic shotmaking.
The differences - Harvard v. Yale, 1 new puppy v. 3 girls, 22 v. 39.
It looked like she just ran out of gas at the end. Great match.

1 Beer and We'll Go

Pat's BAR was actually pretty good. The dramatic decisions coincide with the mood swings of those making them. The discussion went from "Turn Right" to "1 beer to be social" to a plethora of food - calamari, coconut shrimp, pizza and the "I'm not sharing my shrimp salad with you" special that Nina wouldn't let anyone near. It looked good. Good thing you didn't gag on it given the size of the bites you were taking.

RIDE HOME

Certainly interesting but much too serious. Hypothetical v. the real thing. The Consequences to an individual v. the responsibility to society as a whole. Protection of our children v. teaching them a lesson and suffering the consequences. To whom do we owe a greater priority - family or neighbor? The ride to the match was more fun than the ride home.

Remember - It's a marathon and not a sprint.
Drink water. Lay off the empty calories. Eat something on the day of the match.

Capt. Morgan